Negative Thoughts That Hurt Artists and Creatives
Are you following me on Instagram?
I recently have began exploring Instagram as a way to connect with the arts community and provide helpful information for free. As a therapist, I am always trying to find new ways to help communicate the messages that matter to me. In addition, it is a way to provide resources to people that are not meeting with me one on one. All of this is to say that I recently did a series on Instagram about negative thoughts that hurt artists and creatives, and I want to share the highlights here!
Why do these negative thoughts matter?
Self-esteem is a major issue that comes up in my practice routinely. For some, self-esteem is related to their work, and for others, self-esteem is just a source of concern overall. The reality is that most people need to work on their self confidence (yes, even the ones you think might not!). When we let negative thoughts take over, we limit ourselves and shut down the positives all around us. I don’t mean to say we need to be optimists, but we need to put some doubt into these irrational negative thoughts we have. By being able to put some seeds of doubt in regards to the negative, we become more open to the positive!
What is CBT and cognitive distortions? Ugh, does it even matter?!
CBT starts for cognitive behavioral therapy. Quite simply, it is a type of therapy! It is a way to interpret behavior, and skills that help to improve. Overall, I would say it does not matter! I believe in utilizing different therapeutic skills, and I narrow things down to what is helpful for the individual. Cognitive distortions is just “CBT talk” for negative lies we tell ourselves. CBT has a list of terms that breaks down different types of negative thinking. Below I will explain some of these types of negative thinking, and apply it specifically to careers in the arts!
You go into an audition and based on their coldness or apathetic stare you think that means you bombed it. I’m not here to doubt your intuition, but I’m here to tell you this type of thinking is damaging to you. Once that thinking starts, you get more nervous and it gets harder to turn the audition around. You leave the audition and then count that as evidence of your lack of talent, while forgetting all other facts you have! Next thing you know, you’re struggling with auditions overall when they never were an issue before. All because you started assuming you KNOW what others are thinking and internalizing it as fact.
Use your intuition elsewhere, but also don’t let trusting your “intuition” become a way to beat yourself up or to kill your love of your art!
Should statements are another common one that many get stuck in. Often times in therapy I will simply ask “who says you should do that or be that?” The truth is most of the time...no one! If anything, it is us that is putting a ridiculous expectation out there and it is based on no actual guidelines! Sometimes we create these “shoulds” as a way to keep ourselves feeling bad (because it is what we are used to).
It is ok to have expectations of ourselves and it is ok to take feedback, but remember it is not that we should be anything. All we should be is ourselves! Check where your thinking is coming from and ask yourself why are you telling yourself these lies disguised as facts?!
Sometimes when I catch a client using this type of thinking to hurt themselves, they respond that they are trying to curb their expectations. First off, assuming the worst does not free us of disappointment when something we want to happen doesn’t. What is actually helpful is slightly adjusting expectations...but that is a lesson for another day!
Going into a business meeting assuming you know the outcome will be bad does not set you up for success. Being hopeful does not make you an idiot, it actually helps you to see opportunities you might not when feeling negative. It changes the way you approach things completely! You don’t need to be 100% positive thinking to see a change though. As long as you start doubting your negative assumptions, you will see change in your work!
This type of thinking is so harmful because we end up putting so much energy into things that don’t carry nearly as much weight as we think they do. In addition, by magnifying the negative, we make it so much easier to ignore the positive (known as minimizing!).
We can’t afford to do ignore the positive! We need to be our own biggest fans! There can be 100 people in a room and 99 don’t believe in you...I kid 😂 but what would Gaga have done if Bradley Cooper hadn’t been present! I’m sure she would have found a way to be the 1/100 for herself!
This is a super tempting way to process the world! Why? Because it makes the answer simple. Seeing things in grey is always harder. In fact, this type of thinking can be related to prior trauma due to the difficulties in knowing who or what to trust. With the arts, this type of thinking is tempting because we can use it as a way to comfort ourselves or prepare for the worst. However, creating this type of narrative based on minimal info is limiting! Maybe you are a rockstar at cold readings. Maybe that first draft is perfect. Maybe some faith in yourself would be helpful?!
Have you started to catch your own negative thoughts yet?
Don’t worry if you haven’t, it does take practice and time to let them sink in! In the future, I might cover more negative thoughts that hurt artists, but I think all of this is a good start! My hope is to empower you all to make the best art possible and to be the best versions of yourselves that you can be. It is a tall order, but is definitely possible with hard work and the right help on your side. Until next time! xx
